Who Knows What Evils Lurk in a Writer’s Mind?

I can understand how the likes of Stephen King or Nora Roberts are able to come up with tales delving into the darkest recesses of the human mind. Left alone and to their own devices, the mind of a writer is a nightmarish place where the most heinous of human acts lies in wait, lurking until an opportunity for escape presents itself.

Yet there are others like Brenda Novak from whom I’ve grown accustomed to sweet, fluffy, happily-ever-after type tales who suddenly make a sharp left and end up on the dark side with a character like Jasper from “Hanover House” who is so evil and conscience-less I can hardly believe it came from the mind of one I’d believed so pure and sweet.

But then my own mind starts weaving a tale of its own from a story about a decades-old crime that was solve using DNA databases, and I understand how even the purest of minds can take something seemingly benign and turn it inside out, exposing the dark underbelly lurking just beneath the surface of the human mind.

Acknowledging the Dark Underbelly in Us All

Living in society means keeping that dark, underbelly well controlled. Our minds may imagine acts so heinous they make us shudder. Dreams may be filled with gruesome deaths to which we respond impassively. We may kill off characters without a second thought for either their pain or their demise.

On the outside, we open doors for strangers, give food, money, or time to the homeless, cry over a dead cat we see on the road. But inside, we’re imagining our next murder and looking for ingenious ways to hide the body so no one ever finds it, much less connects it to the alter-ego we write about in our books, articles, and journals.

A Safe Outlet for Murder, Mayhem, and Lust

In many ways, I think being a writer gives us a safe outlet for our murderous thoughts. When I think about it, it’s not just the murderous, heinous ones either. What about the lustful ones? The guy you saw strutting around the bar, built like a brick outhouse, wearing a t-shirt a size or two too small?

The shy introvert many of us are would never even consider approaching him or saying hello. But when our fingers fly across the keyboard, we tell a completely different story, one of adventure, lust, and consummated dreams. We are much braver on paper, or while we’re sleeping.

In my dreams, I can watch a man die without batting an eyelash. I can engage in my most lust-filled fantasies without embarrassment or shame. And if those steamy scenes find their way into the pages of a book, well, they’re just something I dreamed up (quite literally). Nothing I’d ever find the guts to engage in myself.

A Little of the Writer in Every Tale

I believe most writers live at least a little through the characters they create, and most often, through the more memorable ones. We never really want to be axe murderers or torturers of innocents; sirens or players. But we can sure as heck live vicariously through those we create and give them the most outrageous of qualities. We can drain them of every ounce of remorse for their actions, absolve them of guilt for everyone they mistreat in their quest for personal pleasure. They’re not real, and they’re certainly not us…are they?

In a way, it’s like a chess game we play with ourselves, moving people around the chess board of our stories. We control their behavior along with the outcomes. Or that’s what we’d like to think.

The truth is, quite often, the stories write themselves. I know it’s true for me, and I’ve heard the same from other writers. We sit down with keyboard, or paper and pen while the words flow through our fingers creating scenes we didn’t even know lay waiting in the depths of our minds…and maybe they didn’t.

Admitting to the Evil in the World of Humans

Frankly, I’m not willing to admit there are murderous tendencies lurking deep within my psyche. As angry as I’ve gotten over the times someone has undermined me, hurt me, or even just cut me off in traffic, I never succumb to murderous rage, nor consider, if I did, acting on that rage. Quite the opposite, really. I tend to take responsibility for allowing the mistreatment or abuse, and work on forgiving myself for letting someone get to me.

Let’s be honest, though. There is evil in the world. Deeper, darker evil than most of us can imagine. Why else would the police be arresting murders and child abusers, or chasing a cold case using new methods which weren’t available 30 or 40 years ago? People without conscience do exist. Getting pleasure from giving pain is a real thing. And not all who commit the most heinous crimes against humanity imaginable are caught and punished.

When writers write about horrific acts, or evil geniuses like Palant from “Bones” who could hack into computers using the most rudimentary of tools, wreaking havoc for years, it’s because that kind of evil really does exist. The heart of man is far from pure. Greed, lust, power madness all exist. We see evidence daily, even if we only catch a snippet or two of news like I do.

For Every Evil, There’s a Good to Balance the Scales

Thankfully, those same hearts also contain an enormous capacity for good. It’s like the story attributed to a Native American about the two wolves living inside us. One is good and one is evil. The one which survives is the one we feed.

There are and will always be people who feed the evil wolf, just as there are those who feed and nurture the good one. Though many won’t want to hear this, we need the balance. An abundance of evil needs no explanation or qualification. But an abundance of good would hurt society too because it would inhibit our quest for bigger, better, smarter, stronger. That innovative drive comes from a place of discontent with what is. The good wolf is happy being kind, compassionate and nurturing.

In truth, we all find a balance within ourselves. It’s simply a writer’s job to emphasize all sides. Magnifying those traits, even to the point of making them look ridiculous is our way of demonstrating how much balance is needed; in ourselves as well as everyone else.

Weaving Our Tales

Our minds take things apart and reassemble them because we can do nothing else. We pick at a thread in the fabric of life, not only to watch it unravel, but to see what unraveling will reveal, and how we can re-weave it into something completely different.

Is it any wonder writers and story-tellers are said to weave a tale?

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, Virtual Assistant and advocate for cats. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. She is available for ghostwriting to help your business grow and thrive. Her specialties are finding and expressing your authentic self. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author.

Be sure to watch this space for news of the upcoming release of “Forgotten Victims: Healing and Forgiving After Suicide”.