When the World Goes Awry, Adapt
Today didn’t go as planned. This time I was thwarted by weather, but it could have been anything. What matters is instead of whining about what I couldn’t do, I allowed myself to align with current circumstances, and adapt by changing my focus.
Just because I couldn’t go outside and whack away at the jungle my yard has become since the person I used for gardening became unavailable, I accepted it was a task for another day, and opened my mind to possibilities. Working outside wasn’t an option, but by looking at what I’d already accomplished, and what I might even get a jump on, the day proceeded in a more positive, productive direction.
The heat and humidity precluded working in the yard for long enough to make any headway with the weeds. Instead I:
- Washed a load of clothes
- Washed 2 loads of bedding
- Took 2 5-gallon bottles of water out of the car and put them away
- Took the Costco-sized box of diapers out of the car and put it in my storage room
- Fixed healthy meals
- Wrote 2 blog posts
- Exchanged texts and messages with my daughter and 2 friends
Creating New Routines
Not to mention things which have become daily habits over the last few months:
- Morning pages
- Make the bed (even though I later took it apart again)
- Feed the cats
- Give Dylan his meds
- Get dressed
- Write an inspirational post for Facebook
- Do a Facebook Live
- Brush my teeth and take all supplements and vitamins
- Wash and moisturize my face
- Meditate
Sure, for many people the bulk of this list sounds like a no-brainer, but given both my own history of slovenliness, and current abnormal conditions, things like getting dressed every day, washing my face, and brushing my teeth could easily fall by the wayside in the struggle to adjust to the new, albeit temporary normal. I’ve found by making a point of prioritizing self-care, it’s easier to adapt when things go sideways even further.
There will always be days when fate, the Universe, or whatever you want to call it throws a monkey wrench into your plans. For me, it might be a migraine, or internet issues, or suddenly discovering I lack a key component in order to complete a task. I’ve discovered if I accept what is with a positive attitude, I can find a work-around, or take steps to obtain the missing ingredient even if it means delaying my plans for another few days.
Seeing a Delay as Necessary Course Change
For the most part, there isn’t anything that will suffer for the delay except the whiny child inside 
who wants everything NOW, and she’s easily subdued by introducing her to all the other tasks waiting to be managed. It also helps to remind myself of all I’ve gotten done, even before I jump into whatever I might have planned for the day. The ever-increasing list of daily activities is a welcome reminder that not a day goes by when I haven’t accomplished something worthwhile.
Speaking of worthwhile, the definition has evolved for me in the last couple of decades. Once upon a time, it meant having a “good” job, making “decent” money, and occasionally even being recognized for my hard work and dedication. Years of pursuing a dream that was solely in the hands of other people left me frustrated, angry, and resentful. I constantly suffered from stress, and a lack of decent self-care.
Today, “worthwhile” means something entirely different. Self-care is on the top of the list, followed by things like:
- Exuding positivity
- Encouraging others
- Writing regularly and prolifically
- Managing and augmenting my daily, non-negotiable habits
- Connecting with friends and family
- Being a contributing member of my communities
- Spending quality time with my cats
- Adapting to life’s changes gracefully
- Expanding my knowledge base
- Promoting my business by developing relationships
Evolving Priorities
You’ll notice that making money, and achieving recognition have fallen off my list. In the first place, I honestly believe doing what I love will ensure my needs are met. In the second, I’ve learned I don’t need recognition or validation from anyone except myself.
While everyone wants to be heard, I’ve found the more you fight for it, the less people hear you, and the more your message gets buried in your own frustration. In order to speak my truth, I had to stop trying to word it so others would hear and understand. Instead, I had to speak from my heart and trust those who wanted or needed to hear would. Otherwise, I’d be back to screaming into the wind where I always ended up with egg on my face, and misery in my heart. No matter how loud I screamed, or how hard I tried to get people’s attention, my messages died with the pitiful, weak voice I used to speak them. I may have been right, but no one cared to hear it.
Choosing “Happy” Over “Right”
Recently, someone posed the question: “Would you rather be right, or happy?” Once, I would have answered “right”. It took disconnecting from the corporate world for me to discover I want to be happy, and frankly, I’d never be right unless the people I was talking to wanted to listen with an open mind. In my former environment, priorities were more on personal agendas than on what was right, and nobody cared if someone else was left to clean up the mess.
If I learned nothing else, it was to state my case simply, then let go of any emotional attachment. Plant a seed, and believe it will grow where it’s supposed to. Hard as it’s been to let go of that attachment, it’s been the most liberating, healthy lesson I ever learned. I can neither force a seed to grow, nor make other people nourish the seed unless they believe doing so will make a difference in the world from their own perspective. I can only adapt to what happens when each person makes their own choice.
I’m reminded of the quote:
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back it’s yours. If not, it was never meant to be.
Once, I thought this only applied to people, but I realize now it’s applicable to anything: ideas, people, hopes, dreams—basically anything you hold near and dear to your heart, and would otherwise cling to, or force to grow and thrive. Like the butterfly, if you try to force the process, you’ll end up irreparably damaging, and misdirecting that which might have grown best when left to its own devices, and perhaps, the whims of nature.
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri 
believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.
If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author. And check out her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward.
Be sure to watch this space for news of the upcoming releases of ” Rebuilding After Suicide” and “Sasha’s Journey”.
